THE DAY AFTER

Fear begets fear

The Day After brings a rash of thoughts. What's next? More terrorist activity? Further building collapses in lower Manhattan? An end to the blaze still going at the Pentagon?

I dread the thought of the finger-pointing and the general, non-specific, bigoted hatred response. We must be sure not to subject Middle Easterners to "Guilt by Turban." Middle Easterners surely were among those who died in yesterday's carnage. The suffering was aimed at anybody and everybody having the misfortune of being in one of those buildings, those planes, etc.

The "invisible perpetrator" must not succeed in accomplishing polarization and stereotyping amongst us. In the melting pot that is NYC most specifically and the whole country in general, there are countless Muslims, Mohomeddans, Hindus, and other similar groups who have nothing to do with the events of yesterday.

Their apparel may seem similar to that of the lunatic fringe group responsible for the WTC bombing back in 1983. That is not reason enough to cast the pall of guilt and shame, the burden of responsibility for the actions of others.

These are such difficult times.


e-mail dialogue

Since the events of yesterday I have maintained a somewhat consistent e-mail dialogue with our friend Keith in the UK. He told me he'd thought the folowing e-mail was written for the weblog. He read it aloud at his favorite pub (where they know all about his stateside friends Susan and Dean) and I think he said he printed it out and posted it, as well.

My DSL went down, but a dial-up account is working. Phone circuits in and out of Manhattan are very difficult. The effects are many, and are far reaching. What follows is a post I sent to Keith a little earlier, in the middle of the night.</font>

Keith,

Things are very strange. Unlike ever before, that's for sure.

My office overlooks the main street of this bucolic suburb, just north of NYC. Sitting at my desk I usually hear the shuffle of people moving about, outside. I am on the second floor, so the street noises usually just glide right in. There's a convenience store below me, and I often hear muffled discussions of customers as they come and go, having bought the day's paper, maybe cigarettes, a pack of gum, a cup of coffee, possibly a Lottery ticket, or such.

Today it was eerily quiet. That quiet broken by the sounds of sirens, seemingly fire engines or ambulances, starting up from afar and racing past my office on the main street. Located right by a main fire house, another hook and ladder company just up the street, a half-mile or so from the hospital, a mile from the local Ambulance Corps, and around the corner from the Village Police station, it is not necessarily unusual to hear sirens. But today the cacophony of sirens seemed to recur a few times each hour.

My e-mail service went down, and for quite some time I had no internet access. I use DSL, but of course the bottom line vendor/provider for DSL is the always the local phone company, since DSL rides the copper wire from the Central Office to the inbound demarc point where the phones connect. I am using a dial-up line (and man, is it slow) to send this, and to see what's going on over the web.

I finally heard from Susan, and from my parents. I had phone calls and e-mail from people far and wide, including many on your side of the pond. It is nice to know so many were concerned. It makes me sad, maybe the better choice of words is sadder, though, thinking about the massive loss of life and the disruption in so many people's lives.

The lives so many knew and took for granted as a part of their day-to-day routine are now shattered. The impact on me is minimal, but yet I feel such an onrush of emotion, concern, grief.

In the City they've closed everything south of 14th Street, and are asking people to evacuate all areas below there. I had heard from Susan at work (she got through via phone, which is a miracle itself -- all the lines are jammed, Verizon the local provider has been inundated with activity and congestion) and all was fine with her.

We didn't speak again. I tried to get through a few times, to no avail. That three-tone beep, and then the "please try again later, circuits are busy" recording kept coming on. I imagined Susan made it home, and would be fine.

But late this evening Susan's brother (the one who lives close to where I am, also up here in Rockland Co.) called to ask if I'd spoken with Susan or their mother. I told him it had been very early in the day when I spoke with his mother, and that I'd heard from Susan later on. He was concerned at being unable to reach their house, and wondered if they'd evacuated, given the location of the house.

I gave him Susan's cell and pager numbers, and we agreed to both keep trying and to let the other know if we got through. Sometime close to midnight I checked in with him, and was told that they could not get through.

I did get to Susan's pager, and left some numeric messages. Sure as I am that she and her mom are okay, I would feel much better hearing it from her, in her voice.

This concern is, of course, minimal in comparison to the carnage and destruction, the assault on life-as-we-know-it that occurred today.

My cable remains out (supposedly they will be here Wednesday to fix it), so I've been listening to the radio and checking out some internet News sites. It is a very surreal feeling, being alone here, just me and the cat and the radio. The long time during which the DSL was down -before I got back on using dial-up- made it a touch odder, that feeling of being cut off from the world.

I heard Bush's speech, which was the usual rah-rah but nothing of any substance. I suppose it was intended to make Americans feel safe and secure that the government remains in place and operative. But I see Bush as a miserable leader, one who delivers a "win one for the Gipper" speech in the face of adversity or challenge. No plan, no solution, no "gipping," just a go-get-'em-gipper speech.

Last week, addressing the fact that unemployment is at the highest point in ages, he gave a cheerleader talk, explaining how he believes in the resolve and abilities of Americans to work through it and overcome. Well great. Where the fuck, what the fuck, is his plan? A cheerleading speech from W may make some people feel good, and now a "we'll dole out retribution when we find the terrorists responsible for this" may make for good sound bites, but it leaves me feeling like we have an ineffective wimp in office.

Of course, given the bent of terrorists and the apparent enemies of this state, it probably doesn't matter if W or Gore, or even Bill Clinton occupies the White House. This well planned, coordinated and executed attack has more to do with the perpetrator group's agenda than with W and his cowboy boots and whatever dumb speech he might make.

As you can see, I am in a weird state right now. Can't sleep, can barely tear myself away from the radio or the PC to hear whatever update might be announced.

I heard that a car full of explosives, heading for the George Washington Bridge, was seized earlier this evening. And apparently some evidence was found in the parking area at Logan Airport in Boston, indicating flight manuals and other such materials, in Arabic, was in the car. Of course all the commentators and newscasters are going with the general feeling that Bin Laden must be the source of the funding and planning of this multi-faceted mission. I fear for my Pakistani friends, who may be made to feel as though others think of them as guilty-by-association, since Bin Laden apparently has a base of operations in Pakistan.

All those middle-eastern cabbies in NYC will probably take a ton of abuse. Bigotry will rear its ugly head as people choose to target their anger at likely suspects, and like-type people. I am, of course, equally concerned for Jews all over. There are those who will blame the Jews and seek some measure of recompense, of this I am sadly sure.

Enough of my rambling. Maybe now I can get some sleep. Or maybe not.

--Dean


Note: I did finally hear from Susan again this morning, She managed to get a cell line from uptown. All is fine, there's just no access to phone circuits in Chinatown. And they didn't have to evacuate, although there is some concern that power may be cut at some time today.

More later.